Sunday, May 18, 2008


what is the most powerful words,
why it is so powerful that can stop the addiction of ppl?
why it bond a jelously?
why it can change human attitude?
why thres a motivation to move forward and be more successful person?
why it can't gone but it keep showing?
why its so difficult to say it out or even type it out but sometimes when u say it out, its give u extraordinary feelings.
why its so powerful, it can make u feel full and thres a happiness and u become more brave to do something without hav a second thought.

Example of situation" when u r weak, but when that feeling appear in ur soul, u feel strong and u r refresh and ur spirit bcome strong and ur sickness can even cure quicker.

An answer to my past

Finally I found an answer.

Example: when a couple together, they spend alots of money and time together, but in the end, when they split out, the guy get mad and ask her to return everything to him.
But what is the most precious things u get when u spend time together?
Is the memories and times that matter much, even if she treat u badly but she realise ur existence and u need to know human time is important bcoz there is no 100% possibility they will live for another day and by that time u will regret for what u did if u didnt precious her time.

I aware of this answer when I was form 5.
It because my primary school life. when I was standard 1 I have best friend named Steven Ak Martin. Its wierd even after 8 years, but I still remember his full name.
I seldom or never treat him as good friend nor best friend. I always bully him and tease him as I like without knowing his feeling. There was a time when he was crying after get bully by upper class, I just stand there and watch, and my classmate scold me as a bad friend to him yet he treat me as his best friend.
Even when he ask me to help him, I always ask for a equivalent value. I even always ask him to hand-in my works or even buy foods.

After standard 4, he tell me he going to transfer. And I didnt celebrate with him. but he told me and my other best friend named Daniel Sebastian, "Please don't angry after I left, because we have to split out after all bcoz we have difference goal" .
At the christmas moment, he send a christmas card.
and the card say: "no matter wat happen between us, u r always my best friend" and he drew a lion king on the side.

I don't understand, last time he always say u r not my best friend bcoz I treat him badly.

and I found the answer to my problem after somany years.
It was not how bad or good u treat a person. It was the time u spend and the memories(laugh/sad/happy together) u both made does matter.
A picture describe emotion and a words describe feeling.
when both combine its show that person was crying or very feel down when writing the card.

So I realise and I appreciate with whom I knew. I was totally different now and I learnt from my past. So I will not regret and to make sure this kind of situation won't happen again in future.

I have lost contact with him. If any1 knew his whereabout please tell me. thanks.